Breyen is a little older than five months now, and I have heard many people giving me some advice repeatedly. I know they mean well, but I’m quite tired of hearing some of them.
I love being with Breyen and I think for a second time mum, I’m doing pretty okay.
Now, if I could just stop hearing people, whether family, friends or even strangers tell me:
1. To shave my baby’s head
I know, Breyen is dropping quite a bit of hair and I know his hair is in patches. But I’m totally fine with it. No, I do not need him to grow thicker hair by shaving, and no, I do not believe that just because I shave his head, his hair will grow more evenly. I have seen many kids whose hair still grow in patches after they are shaved.
Most of all, no I do not think that just because he is a boy, I must shave him. I keep hearing things like, “Boys botak (Malay for bald) never mind mah…”.
Well, both my husband and I are okay with Breyen’s patchy hair which will eventually even out as he grows older. So please stop telling me to shave him.
2. To give my baby water
Breyen is fully breastfed and I believe that he gets enough water from my milk. He wets enough diapers, so he is fine.
And no, just because he is having hiccups doesn’t mean I need to give him water.
3. To give my baby semi solids before he is 6 months old
According to his pediatrician, Breyen is growing very well, and there is no hurry for him to start eating things like rice cereal. So thank you for your concern but Breyen will have his first taste of semi-solids when we feel he is ready, which is when he is at least six months old.
4. That my baby is hungry just because he is crying
There are many reasons a baby cries. It could be a dirty diaper, he might be scared, or he just wants to be carried. Please don’t make it sound like I starve my baby and ask me to feed him just because he is crying. I watch his feeding time very closely, so trust me when I say I know he is not hungry.
5. To carry my baby when he is crying
Especially when I am pushing the stroller when I go out alone with Breyen!!! If I carry him, I can’t push the stroller. If I push the stroller, I can’t carry him. Also, sometimes Breyen is just cranky and will quieten down after I push the stroller around for a while.
Besides, I don’t feel good either when I see or hear my baby cry. Please don’t pass comments and make me feel like I am the most cruel mother in the world just because I don’t pick my baby up when he is crying. You may just be making a harmless comment but really, you are adding to my frustrations when I am already trying to pacify my crying baby.