Recently, my Facebook news feed has a lot of photos of my friends in the US bringing their children on vacation at various theme park destinations. I enjoyed looking at how much the little ones have grown and how much they enjoyed the holidays as a family.
At the same time, I felt a certain sense of sadness. When we were living in the US, there were many places that I wanted to bring Phoebie. Legoland in San Diego, Disneyland in LA, the Sesame Street theme park, and so many. Due to certain circumstances, we were not able to bring Phoebie to these places.
I look at Phoebie and I wonder if she missed out. I know she would have loved to see her favourite characters and we would have created a lot of beautiful memories. There is a sense of… regret in me, that I didn’t get to bring her.
As I think more about it, Phoebie is already very blessed. She is very well-travelled compared to a lot of children her age. She has been to quite a few places in the US, and she has even seen snow. Not that she might remember any of those experiences anyway.
So should I continue on this guilt trip that I didn’t get to fulfill certain destinations for her (or maybe it was for myself)? I guess, I can go easy on myself. Holiday destinations for children sound nice and the priceless smiles always make the money spent and the efforts put in feel worthwhile. But I guess, what matters more is how much love and attention Ben and I give her.
Perhaps I should look at it as, going to destinations like Disneyland is a bonus for children. If they get to go, wonderful. If they don’t, it’s alright. And we can always make plans with Phoebie when she is older, when she can participate in the planning and remember more about where we bring her.