What People See VS What We See

Kids. Emotions overflowing.

Adults. Full of emotions but with better control.

Kids, like adults, have moods. They have things they like, dislike, happy or unhappy about, just like adults.

The difference?

Adults, because of our maturity and developed cognitive abilities, have better control over our emotions. Kids? They are more raw with their feelings because they are emotionally charged but not as matured and cognitively developed to control their emotions.

So adults are better at concealing what we actually feel, depending on where we are at and who we are with. Kids, on the other hand, usually simply let their emotions go regardless of where they are at and who they are with.

At the same time, kids, like adults, have trigger points that can bring up certain strong emotions. But again, because of the differences in maturity and development, kids will most likely simply let their emotions show when they are triggered.

I’m not trying to find excuses for when kids scream, cry or throw tantrums. I’m just saying that kids are learning to control their emotions as they grow, develop and mature. And every kid is different because they develop at different paces.

Yet, we all know that our kids, while they can be challenging in certain situations, all have their sweet, thoughtful and caring (wow) moments too. The thing though, is not everyone has a chance to see that.

As parents, we probably spend the most time with our kids than anyone else, so we get to see every emotion, every side and every characteristic of our kids – the good, the bad and the ugly.

Friends and sometimes family, don’t always get to see every single aspect of who our kids are. Sometimes they only get to see the good, because our kids always happen to behave well around them.

Some people only see the bad and the ugly because for some reason, our kids are always triggered when we happen to be together.

Even though as parents, we know all the good, bad and ugly about our kids, we cannot help but be affected when certain comments are passed about our kids, especially when it’s about the bad and the ugly.

But at the end of the day, it is really important to remind ourselves that we know, while our kids may have certain negative behaviour at times, they do have and are capable of the good too.

(Again, not trying to find excuses for tantrums and misbehaviour.)

Perhaps when we can remember more of the good that we see and know instead of the bad and ugly that others see and comment about, we can bring forth more patience when we handle our kids during the bad and the ugly, because as parents, we are the ones who truly know what good our kids are capable of.

And when we can remind ourselves of the good our kids are capable of, we can also remind our kids the good they are capable of, and encourage them to bring out more of the good, and control the bad.

Positive reinforce.